A c31s01
Info Absolution (Summary - List of stories) . The Murdered Albatross << previous act | Act 4 of 4 | next act >> Dedication << Act 4 |''' Chapter 31 of 39 | next chapter >> << previous scene | '''Scene 1 of 2 | next scene >> Summary * Location: *Participants: *Time: *Summary: Text Outside Ponyville, there was still wreckage everywhere: signs of battle, broken traps, barricades that had yet to be taken down. The many, many corpses had been taken care of, at least: the dead of friends and family attended to, the bodies of bugs thrown in with the hulking ruins of their former queen and burned until nothing was left. There was still much damage to be repaired throughout the town, but the blood had been wiped up, and the most necessary repairs had already been made. More important than tending to the village, however, was the rituals of tending to their lost and dead. And today, only a few days after everything that had happened, there was a gathering in front of the library around a polished ironwood casket that sat upon a golden stand, Rustproof's cutie mark carved into the lid, and bouquets of flowers laid out all along the surface of the coffin and the base of the supporting frame. Celestia stood silently behind the coffin adorned only in bandages, looking silently over at Cowlick and Ross. The earth pony mare was breathing shakily, eyes red from crying, a veil over her face and black scarf tied around her neck. Ross had a black band around one upper limb, his eyes low, a foreleg wrapped tightly around Cowlick as he trembled a little now and then: death was hard for him to see. The death of his son was almost impossible for him to deal with. Antares sat at the front row, rubbing at his eyes over and over, tears spilling down his cheeks now and then despite his best efforts to be strong. He felt like a miserable, worthless failure, and he couldn't believe that Rustproof had sacrificed himself, still couldn't grasp that his friend... was gone. Prestige sat beside him, carefully rubbing Antares' back, creating a gentle rasp with each pass of her hoof over the bandages wrapped around the glossy black stallion's ribs. And Meadowlark was on his other side, trembling violently, rubbing at her own eyes every so often as her other hoof tightly clutched a bauble hanging on a string around her neck. A toy Rustproof had given her when he was just a baby and she had been a young, mean-tempered foal. A token that she had always kept... that she would never, ever let go. Rainbow Dash and Applejack were with Avalon, who had her head bowed silently, one wing in a cast. And Twilight was here as well, wearing a thick cloak to keep her body out of sight, stitching over her face and the Lich's features mostly restored, but still a little visibly unstable, visibly strange. But even if she wasn't complete yet, she had to be here for Cowlick and Ross. She had to be here to support her friends, and her family's own suffering. And she had to be here to honor Rustproof and what the colt had done for his friends and family and Ponyville. There was silence... and then finally, Cowlick shakily stepped forwards, taking a slow breath before she rose her head and said quietly: "Rustproof... was my son. Was the greatest damn boy... the greatest damn blessing... I could have ever asked for in my whole stupid life. I look out over all of you today, and... I know that I... didn't deserve him. I don't know how the hell he turned out as wonderful as he did. I only know that each and every one of us here owes him our lives, and I know that he did it for... for me, too. That he saw his Momma being... being an i-idiot... and he s-s-saved me like he'll never know that he always goddamn did so many times..." Cowlick clenched her jaw, shivering violently as she leaned over the coffin, then she looked up and slowly over the group: almost every pony in Ponyville was here, every Nibelung, demons, faces she knew and faces she didn't before she breathed slowly and forced herself to straighten, shaking her head out violently. "Don't any of you forget what he's done, why he did it. He didn't do it to hurt nobody, Rusty wasn't ever like that, not even... not even with people who deserved it. He didn't do it to kill or destroy, he did it to save us. He took on that monster to save us, not to take revenge, not because he wanted to hurt it. All of you remember that. And all of you... make sure you do what it takes to prove we all deserved that. Because I sure as hell didn't." Cowlick dropped her head forwards, breathing slowly in and out as she trembled a little, then swallowed thickly before stepping back and nodding to Celestia. The ivory winged unicorn bowed her head silently to Cowlick, then she stepped forwards and said quietly: "We will now proceed to what has been chosen as Rustproof's final resting place." Antares trembled for a moment, then he took a slow breath as he stood, along with Rainbow Dash, Greece, and Meadowlark. The four strode silently to the coffin, regarding it for a few moments before Celestia nodded slowly, and they each walked to a corner of the casket, Antares reaching up to silently touch the ornate, shaped black handle. He looked at the coffin: smaller than Rustproof would have fit in, and he wondered silently for a moment why they were doing this. But as he and the the other three all lifted the handles at once, the ponies settling the larger grips across their necks and Greece setting his own on his shoulder, keeping it gripped steady in one hand, he realized why as his eyes traveled to Ross and Cowlick. This was closure. This was a ritual not for the dead, but for the living, as Celestia strode ahead with the mourning parents, and the pallbearers followed... and following them, came first Rustproof's friends and family, and then the rest of those who had gathered. It felt like they were leading all of Ponyville in procession, as Antares bowed his head low, keeping his pace slow and steady. At the other front corner was Rainbow Dash, while Meadowlark and Greece brought up the back. It was hard, and it hurt, and Antares felt tears pricking his eyes again and on his cheeks as he breathed quietly in and out, but moving made the pain easier. Carrying this coffin didn't feel like a weight: it felt like an honor he didn't deserve, as he wondered silently where Rustproof was... if he was gone forever, if his spirit lingered here in Ponyville, if he was in Valhalla above. They headed outside of Ponyville, and to a beautiful little hill lit by the bright noonday sun, as clouds rolled carelessly through the blue skies above that were free, and happy, and gazed down upon the earth below and all the trials that the world faced without either mockery or compassion. Antares breathed quietly as they reached the top of the hill, where a tombstone had been placed... but no hole had been dug in the earth, no grave gaped, waiting hungrily for the coffin. Celestia, however, gestured gently at them to set the coffin down, and the pallbearers did so, not questioning what was going on before they stepped carefully back. Others began to gather around them in a loose circle, blanketing the hilltop and gazing silently at the coffin. Then Celestia rose her head and began to speak, but Antares barely heard the words: all he was able to do was study the coffin, and think of Rustproof, and everything that the earth pony had done... how the young colt had been everything Antares knew he had to try and become himself. He didn't realize how much time had passed, or even that the funeral was over until Meadowlark quietly touched his shoulder, and the young stallion looked up to see everypony was filtering away. He looked back and forth, and Prestige smiled faintly before she simply bowed her head to him silently and respectfully turned to follow Celestia, and Antares gazed after her with thankfulness before Aphrodisia said quietly: "I miss him." "Me too. He... he was always..." Avalon shook her head slowly, trembling a bit, and Rainbow Dash nodded silently as he reached up to touch his daughter's shoulder gently, as Applejack sat back with her hat held tight to her chest. Cowlick and Ross were standing on the other side of the grave as well, and then the engineer mare trembled a bit before she looked up and asked in a surprisingly dry voice: "You still up for... spending some time together tonight, Dash?" "Yeah. Definitely, Big Mac and Applejack will have the whole... everything set up. Pinkamena's helped a lot too." Rainbow said finally, and Applejack nodded firmly. Cowlick only gave a faint smile, and Rainbow hesitated... then simply nodded, patting his daughter on the shoulder before he turned to leave with his wife. Avalon rubbed at her face again, and then she looked up finally and said quietly: "I wish I'd treated him better." "You treated him fine. You treated him good." Ross murmured, and then he looked up and smiled faintly, the unicorn trembling a little. "Rustproof always liked you, he did. He wouldn't want you to feel bad... he... he always just wanted to make ponies smile." "He did. He always did." Avalon whispered, and then she trembled a bit before cursing quietly to herself and turning away. After a few moments, Aphrodisia followed her as well, giving a faint smile to Rustproof's parents but clearly not knowing what to say or do otherwise, as she and Avalon left. Meadowlark and Antares simply stood for a while at the base of the coffin... and then Cowlick finally leaned up and whispered something to Ross, and the unicorn nodded quietly before he and the engineer traded a fierce, tight hug. Then he turned, walking quietly towards town, and Cowlick gazed after him silently as she said quietly: "There's nothing wrong with Ross, you know. Best goddamn thing that ever happened to me... except for Rusty. And I'm... I'm glad that Rustproof grew up so much like his Dad, nothing at all like... me..." She almost spat the last word, and Antares glanced up silently as Cowlick shook her head slowly, then closed her eyes and leaned over the coffin, resting her hooves against it as she murmured: "I wish... I'd never kept anything from him, whether it was for good or bad. He deserved more. He deserved to know that... that..." "He did know." Antares said quietly, and Cowlick looked up sharply, the young stallion gazing silently down at the coffin. "He knew, Cowlick, that you and Ross... weren't his birth parents. But he said it didn't matter. He said he was lucky to have you... both of you. He loved you, Cowlick, with all of his heart. He admired you... you and Ross... you were all he wanted to ever impress. To ever be like." "I..." Cowlick trembled a bit, and then she dropped her head forwards, shivering a little. Antares and Meadowlark were silent, and then both traded a look before beginning to turn away... but before they could get very far, Cowlick looked up and asked quietly: "Hey, where do you think you're going? We ain't done yet." Antares frowned, looking over his shoulder as Cowlick reached up and yanked off her veil... and then she smiled faintly, even through her tears, as she walked over to them. Meadowlark and Antares both winced when she threw a foreleg around them both, hugging them firmly up against her before they returned the embrace, and the engineer dropped her head forwards, closing her eyes as she whispered: "All you kids are so goddamn important to me... now, now more than ever. Meadowlark... he adored you. And you were always good to him, no matter what else you might have once been. And Antares..." Cowlick drew back as Antares glanced up at her... and then he yelled in shock when she punched him hard in the face, knocking him onto his back as he grabbed at his bloody nose in shock, staring up at her stupidly before the earth pony seized him by the ruff of the neck and jerked him up off the ground, glaring down into his eyes. "Don't piss on my son's memory by thinking you should have done better, or whimpering about how it's all your fault. Learn a thing or two from him, 'cause goddammit, he looked up to you like a big brother, always counted on you. And you didn't fail him. You didn't fail anyone. This wasn't your fault." Cowlick closed her eyes, then she dropped him and shook her head out, looking silently over at the coffin as Antares breathed heavily, laying on his back as Meadowlark stared in shocked silence, and then the engineer nodded once to herself before turning and quietly striding back up beside the casket. Slowly, Antares forced himself up to his hooves... and then he stared as Cowlick grasped the lid of the coffin and opened the top half of it. She reached in... and to Antares' further disbelief, pulled out a six pack of beer. She yanked one of the cans free and tossed it to Meadowlark, who caught it out of luck more than anything else, then tossed one to Antares, who fumbled it, then clutched it between his hooves as the mare sat back against the open casket. She pulled a can free herself, then dropped the rest in her lap as she gazed up at the sky overhead, saying quietly: "Rusty wouldn't want us to be sad, and I'm not very good at this whole... funeral business. After my Dad died, I didn't cope too well... lots of drugs, uppers and downers. I think it'd be better to honor my son's memory... to remember him... if you two will share a beer or two with me, and we can talk about old times." There was silence for a few moments... and then Meadowlark slowly walked forwards, and quietly sat down beside the engineer. Both mares looked towards Antares, who breathed slowly in and out, feeling tears drying on his face and blood still running from his nose... and then he sighed tiredly and shook his head before striding forwards, sitting down beside Meadowlark and dropping his back against the coffin as he mumbled: "Cowlick, if anyone sees us..." "Screw 'em and screw what they think." Cowlick muttered, and then she cracked her beer open. Meadowlark smiled faintly as she did the same, and Antares hesitated a moment longer, then sighed and nodded, opening his own. The three bumped their cans together, then Cowlick nodded firmly once before raising hers high and saying firmly: "To Rustproof. To my son. The best engineer who ever lived, and the bravest son of a bitch ever to set hoof in Ponyville." "To Rustproof." echoed Meadowlark and Antares, and then all three ponies drank deeply, Antares closing his eyes at the coarse taste of the beer before he lowered his cane as Meadowlark grimaced a little, and Cowlick drained at least half of her can in several large swallows. Then the engineer sighed and settled, the three lowering their heads silently. Finally, Antares couldn't help but look up and ask finally: "Is the whole coffin full of beer? And how did you get that past Celestia, anyway?" "No, there's only a few packs in there, and either Celestia didn't notice me throwing stuff in or she just didn't care. This thing is just... just for show, anyway." Cowlick reached back and knocked quietly on the coffin, lowering her head a little as she closed her eyes. "I ain't gonna even bother putting it in the ground. I don't need to, I guess I just needed... to get it out here. To go through all the motions to... start... processing what happened. "Rustproof..." Cowlick lowered her head, and then she smiled faintly even as a tear spilled down her cheek. "Always so good tempered. And so goddamn big, I remember that even as a foal he was so goddamn big. Ross and me... we were so scared when we first adopted him. I mean, us, parents, of this kid I was basically getting not because I even wanted one, because I wasn't about to let that jackass Narcissa sell some poor baby off to the highest bidder. "And Ross, well... yeah, his wiring's a little funny, so I was worried about him. But wouldn't you know it, I'm the one who ends up being cranky and whiny all day, who doesn't cope well with the baby, and Ross... Ross, he blossomed. You shoulda seen it, the way he handled that kid... he was goddamn amazing. So gentle, so good, just... always knew what to do." Cowlick laughed, shaking her head slowly as she whispered: "But Ross has got so much empathy... such a big damn heart. Me, I don't got that." She quieted, then shook her head slowly as Meadowlark laughed a little and glanced over at her, murmuring: "You're too hard on yourself, Cowlick... Rusty always told us... how good you were to him. How much he didn't deserve you two... how he hated when he made you guys upset." Antares nodded as Cowlick glanced up quietly, looking at them silently. "He was never mad at you two... and I know that sometimes, even I was... I didn't always get along with my parents. But Rustproof, I never heard him say a bad word about either of you once, and he always knew you were fair with him. If anything, he was only ever upset with himself... like with smoking. He knew he deserved the punishment and... he was always most worried about... if he was just disappointing you two all over again." Cowlick nodded slowly, looking down before she shook her head and murmured: "Seems so stupid now. And what a hypocrite I am, right? I was always telling Rustproof not to do this or that but half the time I'm hopped up on amphetamines or got a cigarette jutting out of my face. I was never a good girl... got in all kinds of crap all the time because I can't keep my mouth shut and I always had to be so damn tough. But Ross, and Rusty... they... they were so gentle to me. Good to me. They made me understand I could just be me... that I didn't need..." She fell silent again, and for a few moments there was quiet before Meadowlark murmured softly: "I think Avalon really is sorry about... you know." "So what, she was tough on Rusty now and then, called him poo-brain. The kid was a little poo-brain." Cowlick was smiling again as she shook her head though, closing her eyes. "But it wasn't nothin' bad. It just went to show that... he had his flaws. And you know, he worked for everything he did, worked his flank off. If he was a prodigy, it wasn't because he had all the right switches on upstairs. It was 'cause he was so... so... I don't wanna say driven..." "Dedicated." Antares said quietly, looking up, and Cowlick grunted as she gestured towards him with a firm nod. "Dedicated! Exactly! And in everything that was important to him in life..." Cowlick smiled faintly once more, looking down and murmuring softly: "I like to think he got that from me, but... I dunno. I've always had a knack for stuff, but... if something got too tough I bitched and moaned and gave up. Rusty... he never gave up. And the results of that... that Iron Horse of his! You two missed it but..." Cowlick looked up at the sky with shining eyes, laughing even through her tears. "I thought he was crazy when he told me about his idea, motorize a bicycle... I mean, who the hell rides bikes around here anyway? Not even the Nibelung do... but he came up with the idea, he drew it all out, and I still thought he was crazy as hell but decided to let him try and put her together. And the Iron Horse... Horses of Heaven, of all the names he could have chosen, why the hell did he have to go with that?" The engineer mare shook her head slowly, laughing again as Antares and Meadowlark both listened intently, leaning towards Cowlick as she continued: "But I'll be damned if he didn't start putting things together in ways that... that I never even envisioned, and you've see that crap I've been up to before, how I've tinkered in robotics. But he didn't need no stupid magic... the most he ever had to do was put together voltaic topaz batteries, and those things hold electricity naturally. And he finished the project and... and..." Cowlick looked down slowly, sipping at her beer before she shook her head and murmured: "She was a beaut. Big, heavy thing, powerful engine, decorated and detailed. He impressed me. I told him he impressed me. But I never let him test drive her... we turned her engine on, sure, made sure she didn't explode but I still didn't ever let him get on that thing. I was... I was scared for him. And maybe I was even jealous of my own son. I should have let him, though, and I should have celebrated with him, because now the only time I saw that monster working was when... when he..." She closed her eyes, biting her lower lip for a moment before a shudder ran through her, and there was silence until Antares said quietly: "He saved us." "He did. He goddamn did." Cowlick murmured, closing her eyes before she drained her beer and tossed the can down the hill. Then she nodded firmly once to herself, eyes opening again as she rubbed her tears away and said quietly: "I think I'm gonna take a look at Rusty's schematics. See if I can figure out his doodles for that thing, and when... when I get better and my brain's all in order again, and my hooves start listening properly, I'm gonna see about building some of those things. Motorcycles, he called 'em. Yeah... and enough weapons. I've built enough stupid weapons over my lifetime, it's time for a change of pace. It's time to build stuff that saves people, like Rustproof would have done." Cowlick looked ahead, then she fumbled another beer out of the six pack before opening it. And for a little while, there was quiet as the three ponies drank, Antares and Meadowlark finishing their own cans and neither complaining or arguing when Cowlick tossed them each a new beer. The trio just sat back together, letting the conversation come when it did, talking now and then about things Rustproof had said or done until they were joined by Celestia... and with her was a beetroot-colored unicorn who was walking on his hind legs, his mane and tail flaxen gold, his horn and eyes both ivory. Antares' eyes widened in surprise as the strange unicorn reached up with not a hoof, but a black, lineless hand to calmly adjust the lapels of the simple suit he was wearing, and Celestia gestured to him quietly as she said softly: "Cowlick, as... a gesture of gratitude, I've asked Kvasir to let us know when Rustproof finds his way to Valhalla. Because I am sure that your son has well-earned a place there." Cowlick glanced up moodily, and Kvasir nodded as he glanced meditatively over the trio of ponies before looking mildly at Celestia, asking dryly: "Is this a common funeral rite?" "Very funny, jerk. Here." Cowlick reached back into the coffin, pulling out another six pack of beer as Celestia looked meditatively at the engineer... but when Cowlick distributed the cans to each of the people there, none complained, none declined. They opened their cans almost as one, and then the engineer rose her can, saying quietly: "Here's to my kid, again. And not just him, but every single one of us. Except for you, Kvasir. God or not." Kvasir only smiled wryly, but he joined them in the toast as they clacked their cans together before they all drank deeply, and there was silence for a few moments as the five sat back. Then, after a moment, Cowlick looked at the strange unicorn and asked quietly: "You can't... give him back, can you? You're boss of Heaven and all, but... you can't bring my boy back to me, can you?" "Not if his spirit has moved on willingly to Valhalla. And even if his Pale wanders reality here, his spirit may be looking for closure, not new life." Kvasir replied quietly, shrugging a little before he glanced at Celestia hesitantly, but when she gestured to him with a hoof, the god nodded a little and said awkwardly: "I am... sorry for your loss. But..." "No, I get it. I do." Cowlick shook her head silently, then closed her eyes as she murmured: "I wish he could come back... I do. With all my goddamn heart. But you can't... change some things. And I wouldn't want to bring my son back as... as something he wasn't, or worse." Antares lowered his head a little as Celestia nodded quietly, and Kvasir silently sipped at his can of beer. For a few moments, there was silence, and then Cowlick looked up and asked moodily: "So when does god himself have time to make social calls?" "The Valkyrie asked me to. Furthermore, we all know what I am, a homunculus created by Valthrudnir out of the blood of the Aesir and Vanir." Kvasir looked distasteful, but Antares smiled faintly: the fact that the god was talking about his origins at all was a good thing, meant he was moving past that shame he had once carried and becoming more confident in himself. In who he was, not just what he was. "I'm a glorified administrator. And besides, I decided to oversee the latest shipment of blessed oil from Valhalla personally. Business." "Business." Cowlick repeated, and then she shook her head slowly and took another drink from her can of beer before sighing and glancing moodily over at Celestia. "I bet you were never very good at giving gifts, were you?" Celestia only smiled and shrugged in response, drinking from her own can as Antares shifted a bit and Meadowlark gazed quietly between Baroness and Kvasir, looking a little out of her element. But after a few moments, Kvasir turned his attention to Antares, asking quietly: "Have you reflected at all on recent events, Antares, and your own quest?" "I... my parents aren't dead." Antares murmured, shifting a bit as Celestia shot a sharp look at Kvasir, but the god only surveyed him silently as the glossy black stallion closed his eyes. "I believe they're out there. And... I know I'm not very good at letting go, but... I don't... see any reason to let go, not just yet." There was silence, and then Kvasir nodded before he glanced down at the can of alcohol in his grip, saying quietly: "If I could bring Odin back, I would. I... miss him. And I know that you do too." He glanced towards Celestia, who shifted a little and looked down with a silent nod. "But as painful as it is... I know that I have to move on without him. Just reflect on things, Antares... I'm not asking you to give up your quest, or saying that you're being foolish. Only that... you need to be ready for what you might discover at the end of your journey. "And on another matter, I'll also be speaking to the Strange Ones on your behalf, even if they are not quite as... obedient to me as they were with Odin." Kvasir paused meditatively, before his eyes roved to Cowlick. "If you desire, while I'm there I can have something made to honor Rustproof." "Like a commemorative plaque?" Cowlick asked distastefully, and then she guzzled the rest of her beer before flinging the empty can at Kvasir, the homunculus god wincing as it bounced off him. "Thanks but no thanks. I already got lots to remember my colt by. And I got friends and family to help me feel better so... why don't you leave me to mourn?" Kvasir sighed a little, but then he nodded after a moment as Cowlick picked up the last beer in the six pack and cracked it open. The god glanced down at his own beer, then he shrugged and sipped at it before turning around, saying mildly over his shoulder: "Thank you for the water." Cowlick smiled wryly despite herself, then she shook her head slowly before glancing over at Celestia, asking mildly as the Baroness sipped slowly at her can: "Are you going to lecture me too? Or are you really going to just sit there are enjoy a drink with me?" "I think I'd prefer the latter, even if you could have gone with something better, Cowlick." Celestia glanced down at the can in her hoof, and Cowlick laughed and nodded, smiling faintly as she sat up a bit. "I could have, but... I don't want to be getting drunk today or anything, Celestia. That's no way to honor my son. Just... a good drink, and a good talk with friends." Cowlick replied quietly, raising her own can, and Celestia smiled after a moment before the engineer closed her eyes. "Yeah. I'm glad you understand. And thanks for... the offer and stuff. I know you mean well and it's appreciated, even if... I think it kind of hurts more, to think my Rusty might end up way up there in Heaven, but it's a place that... you know. I can't ever get him to come down from, any more than I can get up there myself. Like I'm a midget and it's the real high shelf in the supermarket." "I thought you said you weren't trying to get drunk." Celestia said gently, and Cowlick grunted and shrugged as she smiled wryly. Then silence fell between the group, but there was no real need for words for a little while, as they sat together, thinking of Rustproof... thinking of everything he had meant to them all, and everything that the earth pony had saved. Category:Transcript Category:Story